Being the best birth partner

While being in the labour room with all the blood, can seem like a daunting experience, it may be the same for your partner. She may be equally scared and freaked out at the thought of the pain she may be anticipating during child birth or the health of the baby. But keeping those fears at bay and being in there with your partner will be the best support you can give. After all, yours will be the face she would look to, for support in that moment.

Here's how you can cope with your anxiety:

1. Plan before hand

• Talk to your partner beforehand about what she expects and what she doesn't want happening at the time of labour. Let the doctors know in case your partner has any reasonable specific customs or rituals that she may wish for. You will be the one in charge there.
• You may need to spend the night at the hospital too, so in addition to the mom's and baby's bag, pack for your stuff too, so you don't have to scurry back home when your family needs you the most.
• Make sure all the medical papers, insurance files etc. are in place. You do not want to go rushing back home for a missing paper only to miss the best moment of your life.
• Speak to your CareNine case manager for more guidance on packing for hospital

2. Be calm

The experience maybe an emotional rollercoaster ride, but you will just have to handle it. Your partner will be in pain. There could also be some unexpected emergency situation that comes up. Your partner will throw tantrums and will yell and scream at you. Just stay calm and exude the coolness of a cucumber. Seeing you calm gives that much more strength to your partner to hang in there

3. Timing

In case you planned the delivery in advance, you may have time in hand before the delivery. Help her time the contractions to let the doctor know when she is ready for delivery. It would be handy to have a stop watch to help with this.

4. Deep breaths

While she is going through those contractions, look her in the eye and breathe in sync with her. Do not run off to call the nurse/ doctor; wait till the contraction is over. She needs your support there and she needs you to help her distract herself through the pain. Try finding a spot on the ceiling she can concentrate on or help her hold on to a baby toy that you bought together; be creative with this, stay calm and walk her through it.

5. Holding hands

Shouting "Go…you can do it" will only get her more irritated while she is in pain. Instead hold her hand, maintain eye contact, and just softly encourage her and assure her every once in a while that it's almost over and she's going to be fine.

6. Stick around

Yes, you are ecstatic on having this baby, and can't wait to spread this joy to the world. But don't run off 2 minutes after the birth; Stay with her; Get her water; Cuddle with her and the baby. Tell your partner how great she was and express your happiness to her first. Then go on telling everyone else.